My Conversation with God Today - 2 Major Lessons

The Nature of God and His Reflection Back to Me

This morning, during my communion with God, I aligned with Him deeply. I am finding the more attention I give to cultivating our relationship, the deeper my meditations and ability to converse with the Godhead presence becomes. In our visit today, I felt as though there was neither time nor a definitive space; I entered an infinite space within myself not easily described. I call it my zero point. Within this void there is neither positive energy nor negative energy. It is a state of complete neutrality that is without recognition. And I must say, at first it feels a bit uncomfortable, because I am used to perceiving in the various forms of positive and negative energies. But as I surrendered my preconceived notions and expectations, I found an inner peace I was able to flow with.

God had two lessons for me today that I want to share with you. The first lesson is on understanding the nature of God. The second lesson is about God as a reflection of our own unique aspect of love.

I had been speaking to God about my innermost desire to establish a deeper conscious connection with his holy presence. Like a daughter to a doting father, my heart longed to be seen, heard, felt and visited by the love and presence of my divine father, whom I consider to be the holy of holies. I had been resolute that He come and visit me in a single point of contact that I would recognize as Him, God. I had some things to talk about and I wanted to be sure He was listening and present with me. During my meditation, I was focused in this manner, in search of his “structural presence.” But God, being God led me in a slightly different direction to learn and experience Him and me in a different way.

In my inward meditative state, I entered my sacred heart and His realm. Here, I am resigned to a stillness that is both captivating and curious. I allowed my awareness to float into observance as I began to talk to God and share the desires of my innermost heart. During our communion, I heard God ask me, “Why do you desire a connection with me?” When He asked this, I halted in my flow because the answer did not come to me immediately. Actually, I was a little baffled by His question and even more baffled that I could not readily rattle off an answer. I sat and felt into my heart, His question, and my answer.

At first I began thinking of all the reasons that I would want a connection with God. But then I silenced my mind that was subtly working, and allowed my heart-mind to take center stage. As I felt for the answer, I became aware of a deep void within myself. It felt vast and unending. As though I was empty and knew not what to fill this emptiness with. I wanted to find the end of it. And then I realized I was actually looking for the boundary or container of God so that I could identify Him and understand Him through His form. A form I could fully wrap myself around and observe energetically. A form I could contain so that I would feel comfortable and complete.

After energetically searching for some time, it began to occur to me that God has neither an energetic nor physical boundary or end point. God cannot be contained and try as I might, the arrival to the perimeter would never come. And I ventured very far in this energetic search. This seemed to bother my sensibilities and my own feeling body. For as I felt for the container, the source, and structure of God, I knew it was not coming.

I had been fixated on experiencing God from the viewpoint of a human being – from the viewpoint of a stationary form of identification that can be pinpointed as God. Like a familiar friend, that when I see him or her I know exactly who it is. Shouldn’t God be like that too? Easily identified from His unique look and feel? Ah, that feels good to get out there. I think everyone has the same question about God and what God looks like and feels like. After all, we only know a human way of thinking and understanding and so it is reasonable that we would attempt to fit God and His characteristics into a human-like understanding. We want to connect with God as we would with a person who has a physical parameter around them that we can observe and easily understand and unite with. This would certainly make God more relatable, wouldn’t it? But the nature of God is far greater.

As we wake up from our slumber, we begin to realize we are multidimensional and are limitless in our ability to expand, create and perceive the all there is. As this occurs, our perception and understanding of God expands as well. While I communed with God and let go of my search for his “structural presence” I began to accept, a little bit, that He is everywhere and always accessible through intention and purposeful connection in our hearts. What occurred to me is that God is what is and also the infinite potential of the all there is. I feel I will be working with this acceptance and new way of relating to God for some time to come.

I remained inwardly still and allowed our flow to simply be. I could not feel my beginning nor end and I could not feel His beginning nor end. We were there together in this zero point of being. I remained with God for a long time and as I did I pondered the answer to his question. Rather, I allowed my heart-flow to discover the answer to His question. And the answer came.

I said to God, “I desire a connection with you so that I can feel your innocence.” In that instant, I felt a profound resonance with God. I burst into tears as my heart leapt with Him. An inner vision of two young children, hand-in-hand came to my mind. This is the same image I have posted in a prior blog about me and God. This was the image He showed me and I deepened into the feeling and emotion rising up.  My heart welled up and burst open for the moment I connected with and felt God’s innocence, I connected with and felt my own innocence. He reflected my innocence back to me. Through Himself, He showed me who I am. I sat in reverence and love for a long time as I drank in the experience and His teaching. 

I share this with you because God is a reflection of each of us, and each of us is a reflection of God. As we ponder God and seek to know Him, He is pondering us and seeks to know us. Just as we know ourselves through Him, He knows Himself through us. It is a beautiful relationship and I am thankful for the direct teaching.

What is the unique aspect of love you hold? I invite you to go to God in your sacred heart chamber and ask Him to show you your unique quality of love.

Blessings of Love and Light.